“Diapering is not just about getting a job done, or having a clean baby. Our hands are a baby’s introduction to the world. If they touch slowly, gently, and “ask” a child for cooperation rather than demand it, we are rewarded with a relationship bound in trust, respect and the inexorable knowledge of our importance to each other.”
“One generally finds that infants are the most content and cheerful in the hands of mothers who move with ceremonious slowness.” –Dr. Emmi Pikler
I was recently introduced to the concept of respectful nappy changing, and the core ideas are ones that can be applied in all of our interactions with our baby!
Often babies make many chores such as changing nappies a challenging one. But the idea of a respectful nappy changing involves interacting with our baby as a whole person who is fully participating in the act. Rather than abruptly tearing the nappy away and hastily fastening a new one in a tug of war like exercise, you introduce a mindful nappy changing that is led by your babies preferences and choices and makes it a bonding and language building exercise.
I certainly needed this advice and perspective to apply to my baby’s nappy changes – and found it made a huge difference!
Please read the original article by Janet Lansbury. How To Love A Diaper Change
But a summary of the key points:
- Set the tone with a respectful beginning, resembling getting permission. Not an abrupt ripping off of clothes etc.
- Don’t interrupt a baby/toddler when he is playing. Babies don’t like being interrupted and doing this can set the scene for a moody nappy change.
- Give choices! Would you like a nappy change now or later?
- Slow down, give undivided, unplugged attention. Appreciate the moment, and exercise some mindful nappy changing!
- Include your baby, ask for his involvement at the task at hand. Don’t just treat him as the possessor of the ‘ewey pooey’ nappy that needs to be discarded! Talk him through each stage, naming different parts of his body helps with language building.
- Be flexible. Stay open to new possibilities. As a baby becomes more mobile you will need to think of creative ways of making him participate. He might like to be on all fours when wiping his bottom for instance.
- Remember, your goal is partnership.
To add an islamic perspective, I would recite the duas of changing clothes and entering or exiting the lavatory to the baby, familiarising him with these duas from an early stage.